3 Reasons Why Men Play Games With Your Heart - the Urban Dater
It Works. Though there are women that will at the sight of games, close the door on a relationship, like all things there are always exceptions. Here are seven mind games guys play and how to deal. That guy may never open up to the idea of a relationship, and you don't want to end up heartbroken. When it is said that people play emotional games either before or during a relationship, what that often depicts is a situation where true feelings.
Did you make the wrong move? It's long been the rule that when dating someone whose behavior is marked by hot and cold reactivity, you're standing on shaky ground. Behavioral extremes indicate a power play is being employed. You're left feeling confused and frustrated.
Whether done consciously or unconsciously, this type of behavior activates longing and pursuit. It's utilized because it works. If we don't understand the game of hot and cold, we can find ourselves pulled into a drama of confusion.
Modern dating is tricky. Once we have the ability to see hot and cold for what it is, we're less likely to suffer its negative effects.
Understanding this type of behavior is crucial even for those of you committed to not playing games. Follow, and they flee. Because relationship uncertainty makes human beings yearn for stability.
Our automatic response is to chase when the "other" pulls away. What was once readily available is suddenly gone, and no matter how hard we try to regain our partner's former affection, it now seems beyond our reach. No, your partner's not confused. They don't need more time to figure out their emotions.
They're not sorting out their last breakup, and they're not swamped at work. Although that may be your hope, it's not the case. And it's crafted for control. The phases of Hot and Cold: The "hot" phase begins with a bang of overwhelming recognition. Your partner has placed you firmly on their radar. Bathed in newfound attention, flattery and flirtation spark a strong attraction for this person. You quickly find yourself craving more of this delicious new feeling. This phase lures you into the hopes of the possibility of romance.
Contact is reciprocal, time is made to see each other, and forward movement is evident. There's an easy, open connection. The hot phase is designed to get you in the gate that leads to the corral, where you'll later be harnessed. Then comes the "cold" phase. Your partner begins to pull away making you long for their previous attention. Whether initiated by a cold-shoulder, avoidance, or lack of communication This phase activates loss, making you yearn for them and wait with bated breath for their call or text.
You wonder what happened and begin to question every move you made. Without realizing it, you've submitted to their need for emotional and psychological control. These are the basic dance steps to this type of behavior.
Each step is a phase, and each phase has a cycle. This formula is predictable and consistent even when your partner's reactions are not.
3 Reasons Why Men Play Games With Your Heart
Simply put, when you pull away, they'll re-engage you. When you advance, they'll pull away. After a cycle or two of this routine you'll be so confused you won't know which way to move. The pattern repeats itself for as long as you're willing to play this game. The beautiful truth is that this has nothing to do with you. If this happens to you, know that he is fully aware that your mind will go spinning off the hook as you start wondering what you've done wrong.
He is just testing your ability to endure. So prove that you can, and don't act needy, although it's important to let him know that you love him. Has He Become Inexplicably Aggressive?
Love & Dating Relationship games men need to stop playing immediately - Pulse Nigeria
You start noticing that the nice guy you are used to has transformed into a violent stranger. The aggression may not only be directed at you, but also at everybody nearby, creating an atmosphere of fear.
I know the situation is not funny. However, the purpose of this terrible ploy is not to hurt you but to test your bravery and tensile strength. He wants to see how much shock you can withstand.
Nobody needs a coward as a mate. Even though your partner may not want to admit it, most men need to know that you are that someone who can actually stand up to them and call them to order at the times they need it the most. Doing so successfully will prove you are a strong and fearless woman.
This is one way to get a girl, any girl, to boil. Actually, I think men love compliments even more than women, but while men are expected to keep this desire on the low, women aren't. Women love to be told how good-looking, pretty, and beautiful they are. So after a woman has laboriously made herself up, she loves to hear her man say he likes the end results.
The same goes for her cooking, sense of fashion, and even lovemaking skills. Women love those words—those sweet nothings. And what does he do? He acts as if he didn't notice anything. Almost as if she did not exist! If this happens to you, you can be sure he's watching your frustration build. You may even be tempted to start throwing a tantrum—which would be playing into his hands.
He is testing you to find your breaking point. He wants to see if you're normal—after all, it is only human to get desire acknowledgement—but he also wants to see if you can handle it when someone does not give you the expected response. This is the worst form of all the mind games he can ever play with a girl. By comparing her with others in a negative light, he is using the most destructive means to point out her shortcomings and faults.
We know that our faults are what makes us human, but when a person deliberately forces his significant other to take another look at herself in such a deriding manner, he is sending an entirely different and more terrible message altogether. If this is happening to you, listen up. You might want to retaliate by revealing or telling him things to prove that those people are not as great as he thought they were.
But before you do something like that, think again. Don't let him provoke you into saying ugly, malicious, and revealing things about other people too easily. If you do, it may show that you are ready to throw people who made the "terrible mistake" of confiding in you under the bus.
He may also think that such a reaction goes to show how you might talk about him the day the chips are down. Besides, he might be really interested in getting you to change for the better. Yes, sometimes the truth hurts. But sometimes, it is only true friends who can tell you that type of truth—he may want you to know that he is indeed a true friend. Is He Flirting with Other Girls?
Mind-gamers know that women are always watching out for those tendencies toward straying that men normally display even unconsciously. And so what does a mind-gamer do? Of course, he sends you those signals! Such a guy will flirt and flirt and flirt just to make sure that you get the message that he may be interested in others more than you.
There are three reasons he may be doing this, and I am afraid to say them, as they are not exactly what you are going to want to hear: He may be flirting with others in order to stoke your latent jealousy and make you more interested in him. He could be flirting for fun now just to test the waters and see what your reaction would be like should he on one bright tempting day forget his boundaries and actually take things too far with another girl.
He could also be doing it to send you the unspoken message that he is planning on calling it quits, and when he does, he will say that it is because he can no longer cope with your possessiveness. If it is for the first reason, you just have to show him the love. That is what he really wants—for you to demonstrate that you really want him. If it is for the second reason, you just go ahead and call him to order by letting him know that even though you know he thinks he is having fun now, that there is a limit to that that rubbish you can stomach.
I bet you he will be shocked to find out that you know the game, and this will definitely make him man up at once. This will also show that you are intelligent, understanding, caring, responsible, and still interested.
If so, there's not much you can do except examine whether you truly are clingy or if it's just his excuse for breaking up. If you're actually being overly possessive, you should be ready to do something about that habit, since it is a turn-off for most men. Is He Becoming Secretive? Suddenly, you notice your man is becoming more and more secretive. If a man is engaging in this type of psychological warfare, there are many ways he could he could go about it.
Mind Games Men Like Playing on Women | PairedLife
He might start by refusing to answer some of your questions. He might stop sharing thoughts with you and start preferring to be on his own. He might start appearing distant and forgetful.
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These actions all are meant to signify a lack of interest in you. True mind-gamers know that this strategy works like magic if the woman in question is really interested, because her significant other's withdrawal will cause her to become more interested in him and his affairs.
The doubts and suspicions he has created in her mind will make her worried, and she will work to find out what is wrong. As with other mind games, purposely creating doubt can allow the mind gamer to find out about how she will react if she ever hears something not-so-great about him. If your man is playing this trick on you, he wants to see for himself whether he can trust you.
He wants to know how you react to gossip and hearsay. He is interested to know if you can actually think for yourself and discern the truth by separating the facts from the chaff of any circulating rumors you might hear about him. Any interested lady will want to know what is going on with her man.
She will try to prove the unspoken message that she couldn't handle what's going on with him wrong by showing him how loyal she can be. In the process, she might even reveal something secret about herself that he never knew—which might even be the reason he launched this type of mind game in the first place. She will demand almost to the point of going hysteric that he tells her everything that is troubling or bothering him. And then, he will be convinced that she is seriously concerned.
So be careful how you respond to this type of mind game. Show support without giving away your own secrets. One wrong move and you can come off as cold or as someone he cannot depend on. Has He Become Disinterested in Sex? One weapon women have over men is in sex.
Men are insatiable—often even hard feelings, arguments, and contempt will not prevent them from wanting to get it on. So when your guy who used to be all over you in the bedroom suddenly develops this inexplicable lack of sexual interest in you, something must be amiss. He'll expect that you will be worried and ask him about it.
If you do, it will show that you are observant and interested in suggestions for how to fix the problem. This will be a big plus for you in his book.
If you don't, he may think that you don't care enough to put his needs first. Your Opinion If someone is playing mind games on you, is he worth it?
Yes, he's just pushing me so that we will grow with one another.