No good can come of it. What are your intentions? Cultivate a platonic friendship with a smidgeon or residual feelings or love sprinkled in? Do you need a friend. Depending on how a previous relationship ended, the ex talk can be one of the more uncomfortable conversations in a . Relationship Advice. New research shows having contact with an ex could harm a new relationship; whether it does depends on the motives for staying in touch.
What did I gain?
She Can't Stop Talking About Her Exes - AskMen
You remember the ones that got away. It's entirely possible that the brain is built that way so that you can remember why it didn't work so that you can do it better the next time. Aside from the evolutionary benefits, talking about your exes can help you communicate to your new partner how you grew into the person you are today.
Often, romantic relationships serve as learning experiences that let you test the boundaries of your interests and needs. Reflecting on a past relationship can even help you find out something about yourself that you may have missed during the relationship and breakup. The American Psychological Association encourages those who have gone through breakups to focus on the positive aspects and outcomesrather than banning talk of exes completely.
While it's ideal to hash out all of your strong emotions before entering a new relationship, the ability to speak freely with your partner is important. There are appropriate levels of sharing. Simply explain what happened with the ex, what you learned and where you are now.
Of course, every couple is different, and you'll have to gauge your partner's curiosity and comfort level -- you don't want to inadvertently make him or her feel as if you're either not over your ex or using your ex as a benchmark by which to measure your new partner.
Still Talking About Your Ex ? Here's are reasons why you shouldn't do it
When it comes to talking about an ex, timing is everything. The strange thing with women is that the minute they realise that a man is falling for them, they do everything in their will to stay away. Not because they don't like the guy, but because here they're trying to follow the "play hard to get". Women, stay away from such complications and do us a favour by just not mentioning your exes. The fact is that, its never really over with your ex but if this man is really it, then you should refrain from doing such things.
Arun Jacob who has been in a relationship for the past one year says that his girlfriend mentions about her ex in a very casual manner, hoping it wouldn't upset him. So that I don't read it somewhere or find out details from other people.
I think that's really sweet of her.
It's nice to know that she tells me everything! If you're on the receiving end of the conversation, keep these in mind: Want to get back at?
Here's Why You Should Talk To Your Partner About Your Ex (Seriously)
However, I had another motivation, which was stupid — Ebba made me insecure. She was intelligent, full of cutting remarks, and, well, Swedish. And I knew she had dated lots of hulking Scandinavian men with high IQs and high-maintenance beards. I've been in relationships too!
She Can't Stop Talking About Her Exes
Which is a bad strategy. You have to be fun and interesting.
I never wanted to hurt her, or make her feel unworthy. It was the opposite. I was puffing myself up.
I was trying to raise myself to her level. But it really annoyed this girl, and eventually, she blew up at me, and that blowup became a series of fights, and our young relationship was ended pretty quickly by a bit of a chain reaction.
And I regret that. It was a fun little fling, ended prematurely by some silly behavior. This is a good rule in dating in general, actually: