Afraid of not being good enough in a relationship

When You Feel Like You're Not Good Enough For Someone

afraid of not being good enough in a relationship

If can identify with these "when you're not good enough" sad quotes after your relationship ends and you break up, look to these words of encouragement and. But how does the message “I'm not good enough” get internalized? children or project onto their children the bad feelings the parent is feeling at the moment. What makes us struggle with these thoughts and feelings in a relationship? But the bigger issue is you not feeling good enough for him. Likely, no matter what.

afraid of not being good enough in a relationship

These defenses may offer us a false illusion of safety or security, but they keep us from attaining the closeness we most desire. Real love makes us feel vulnerable.


A new relationship is uncharted territory, and most of us have natural fears of the unknown. Letting ourselves fall in love means taking a real risk. We are placing a great amount of trust in another person, allowing them to affect us, which makes us feel exposed and vulnerable.

We tend to believe that the more we care, the more we can get hurt.

afraid of not being good enough in a relationship

New love stirs up past hurts. Old, negative dynamics may make us wary of opening ourselves up to someone new. Many of us struggle with underlying feelings of being unlovable. We have trouble feeling our own value and believing anyone could really care for us.

What to do when you don’t feel ‘good enough’ for your partner

While these attitudes can be hurtful, over time, they have become engrained in us. As adults, we may fail to see them as an enemy, instead accepting their destructive point of view as our own.

  • When You Feel Like You’re Not Good Enough For Someone

When another person sees us differently from our voices, loving and appreciating us, we may actually start to feel uncomfortable and defensive, as it challenges these long-held points of identification. With real joy comes real pain. Any time we fully experience true joy or feel the preciousness of life on an emotional level, we can expect to feel a great amount of sadness. The opposite is also true.

We cannot selectively numb ourselves to sadness without numbing ourselves to joy. Love is often unequal. The truth is that love is often imbalanced, with one person feeling more or less from moment to moment. Our feelings toward someone are an ever-changing force. In a matter of seconds, we can feel anger, irritation or even hate for a person we love. Sometimes in the midst of all the pressure, I seem to totally forget all the wonderful, unique things about myself.

I get stuck in my head and allow my inner critic to completely tear apart my self-esteem until I hate myself too much to do anything except eat ice cream, watch daytime television, and sleep.

7 Reasons Most People are Afraid of Love - PsychAlive

And if that one simple word was used in the intended context, this person was basically telling me that one of my posts saved their life. The people you compare yourself to compare themselves to other people too.

Worried You're Not "Good Enough" for Him? Here's Why. // Amy Young

We all compare ourselves to other people, and I can assure you that the people who seem to have it all do not. When you look at other people through a lens of compassion and understanding rather than judgment and jealousy, you are better able to see them for what they are—human beings. They are beautifully imperfect human beings going through the same universal challenges that we all go through. Your mind can be a very convincing liar.

There is more right with you than wrong with you.

afraid of not being good enough in a relationship

This powerful reminder is inspired by one of my favorite quotes from Jon Kabat-Zinn: